Looking at marriage from the perspective of 30-odd years’ experience is quite different from looking at it as a teen-age observer, a newlywed, or a young parent. My love and I find ourselves talking quite often about how we were, remembering what we thought and felt “back then,” and comparing it to where we are now. We are happy to be where we are now!
I came across a poem that expresses all of it for me, and that I hope may be recognized with a smile by other old married folks, and a blessing of encouragement to those who are at an earlier stage:
Lovetime is moonlight,
And marriage is daylight,
And none of us stands the exposure too well;
And most of us long to go back to the moonlight –
Dear nights of moonlight that cast such a spell.
Lovetime is starlight,
And marriage is sunlight,
Hurting our eyes with the glare and the heat;
And most of us long to go back to the starlight –
Dear silver starlight when love was so sweet.
Lovetime is dreaming,
But marriage is living,
And tolerance teaches a way to be blind;
And daylight and sunlight seem moonlight and starlight,
After the years teach us how to be kind.
(This was attributed to Susan Andrews
Kimball and printed in the “Letters”
section of Touchstone, May/June